The Hand of Fate & Destiny, Friendship & your True Self

When it comes to the hands of fate, destiny and friendship, which of these do we accept the most readily?

Friendship means a lot, but we have to work out if we trust people. There are also times when it seems impossible to discuss certain issues with friends or other people that we are close to. At such times people will often turn to an outside, trusted source of wisdom and someone who can hear about their situation, or reflect it to them in some way that is meaningful. I think this is often where ‘psychic’ readings and other divinations come in.

As for the ideas around fate and destiny, sometimes people use these words fate and destiny interchangeably. However, to me, the word destiny has tended to always carry the idea of something self-created, whilst the word fate seems to suggest the idea of a sealed fate that no amount of human intervention can alter.

In this model, destiny is in our own hands, whilst fate is something eked out upon us, something we have to endure or, at best, a set of results we have to discover – as though we have no option about where we go or what we do. Perhaps it doesn’t really matter how we view it. The question still hangs in the air – are we victims of circumstance in the situations we encounter or do we create our own lives through our choices?

This is a question I remember first thinking about in depth as a teenager, studying English literature in college. We were looking at Thomas Hardy’s novel Tess of the D’Urbervilles and one of the exam questions centred precisely on this subject. Tess, the central character, appeared to be lucky in some ways and unlucky in others. Was her sorry situation all her own doing or were others to blame?

I did not have a strong opinion about it at the time, although now I think that Tess was sometimes too proud. But she tried to keep to her principles and some would admire her for that. Either way, whether we see ourselves as victims, whether we our own worst enemies and whether we choose the hard path in life are all worth considering. Because there are always choices; sometimes we just don’t see them. Not without some help, anyway.

Think about a situation in your life now, especially one you are not too happy with. Ask yourself: are we victims of circumstances or do we have a hand in our own fate? Maybe you will have some feelings coming up as you consider this.

Interestingly, this is also a question that often appears in the context of giving and receiving Astrology, Tarot and Angel card readings. These are basically private, person-to-person, soul focussed readings, designed to put a person in touch with their true, inner Self. My belief is that this inner Self is a part of us (or may even consist of several parts!) that can get overlooked or repressed in various situations. I find that the tools in these readings act like witnesses and advisors. Tarot and Astrology never lie and Angel energy adds a strong sense of protection.

There are times when the true Self gets closed down – when the mores of society or the limitations of our personal circumstances don’t allow us to say what we really think and feel. Indeed, sometimes we can’t even feel what we really do feel, we go numb for a while, which can lead to feeling depressed or disoriented, tired or heavy. When we have a chance to acknowledge feelings, then these symptoms of dis-ease lift. The relationship between a trusted reader and the person seeking the reading (the client or querent) is in my opinion sacred because it allows for a person to explore their truth and thereby to contact their true Self in a safe environment. This is one of the reasons why readings ‘work’ for people. So, when clients come asking me “what is going to happen in my future?” I often go into their reading with the question in my mind: ‘well, what do you want to happen in your future?’ – because I don’t see it as cast in stone and fated. I see the reading as an opportunity to explore the paths ahead and for the client to discover more about what he thinks and feels, as an individual person. For therein lies some freedom, power and a chance to choose and create more of his/her own destiny.